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Nine Signs of the Narcissistic Mother | Mother-Daughter Relationships

Dr. Todd Grande

This video answers the question: What are the characteristics of a narcissistic mother in the context of a mother daughter relationship? Can narcissistic mother cause narcissism in her daughter? This video features nine signs of a narcissistic mother as well as a look at parenting styles and the consequences of having a narcissistic mother.

Nine signs of a narcissistic mother:
1. changing a topic of discussion to themselves
2. competing with the daughter
3. making a daughter feel as if she is a burden
4. failing to protect the daughter
5. emotional unavailability
6. controlling and manipulative
7. expecting credit for raising the daughter
8. conditional approval and love
9. boundary violations
Cramer, P. (2015). Adolescent parenting, identification, and maladaptive narcissism. Psychoanalytic Psychology, 32(4), 559–579.
When your mother's a narcissist. By: McKinnell, Julia, Maclean's, 00249262, 11/3/2008, Vol. 121, Issue 43


There are two types of narcissism: With grandiose narcissism we see characteristics like being extroverted, socially bold, selfconfident, having a superficial charm, being resistant to criticism, and being callous and unemotional. Vulnerable narcissism is characterized by shame, anger, aggression, hypersensitivity, a tendency to be introverted, defensive, avoidant, anxious, depressed, socially awkward, and shy.

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